I just don't

If you sell a mouse
a slice of pie, he's gonna want
a Big Gulp, and if you give him
that soda, sure but he's gonna want something
crunchy to top it all off. But if you give
that mouse a pizza, some Doritos, and a
Big Gulp, he'll end up on
your couch, crying about his wreck of a life
and drinking all your goddamn rum once
he's drained the soda.

So if you let a mouse camp on
your sofa, daydrinking and bitching
and eating cheap greasy pizza, you pretty much
deserve what happens next: when you come
home from your job or wherever you go and his little
fat ass has drunk itself to death
on your sofa so now your sofa cushions
have a permanent grease stain from this little prick you thought was your friend
but who couldn't be bothered to go drink and cry at home.

It will never come out no matter how hard
you scrub. Mice are fucking stupid.